First Date Tips for Single Women Over 40

September 1, 2013 - Sunday - 10:15PM - by Patricia Fuqua

Remember your key objective is to just enjoy yourself on a first date. It’s not the time to look for your soulmate, someone to rescue you from your problems, or someone to fix your sink.

Relax. Close your eyes and place your feet flat on the floor. Meditate for five minutes in the bathroom at your work if you can’t go home.If you can go home, take twenty minutes to sit quietly in a chair and listen to the sounds around you as you breathe slowly. Notice your thoughts and feelings but let them go.

Dress for the date after you shower or meditate. It’s hard to feel good in clothes you’ve worn since 7:00 a.m. If you don’t have time to go home, bring your date clothes to work in a clothes bag; include dressier shoes. Choose clothes that you feel good in, but avoid extremes...not too much cleavage or legs because you come across as trying too hard or that you are even desperate.

Look at the first date as an adventure. You are spending time with an attractive stranger who you are going to get to know. You will leave your cell phone turned off and out of sight. You will ask him questions that show you what interests and values he has and if they are compatible with yours.

Practice confident self assertion when you share some information about yourself with your date. Don’t allow yourself to be bored by letting him go on and on about himself and not ask about you. Just keep the conversation light and easy. Serious revelations about you, family or friends need to be left unsaid here.

Let your intuition be your guide.You simply gather data to fuel your intuition about deciding to see him again. If you decide you don’t want to see him again, be polite. If he says you are not for him, feel grateful; he just saved you some valuable time.